This morning I wrote this post stolen from the wee hours just past six. As the little feral kittens waiting for their breakfast line themselves up huddled beneath the branches of the confederate jasmine-like little soldiers amongst barely awakened lawns, I turn to feelings of how rather enchanting it has been to stay at home. I allow those feelings to sweep through me as I believe in the power of satisfying sentiments. I must be transparent and confess that stagnation has been a struggle these last few months, and I'm not sure about you, but I could use the benefits of change in my life. Although I could whinge on about it, allow me to share a poem about Beatrix Potter, which also sums me up quite well. "It was hard for Beatrix to explain to herself, much less to anyone else, how much she wanted her very own house. She had always loved houses--oh, not grand mansions, like her cousins' Melford Hall in Suffolk, or gloomy, respectable houses like her parents' three-story brick house in South Kensington. What Beatrix loved more than anything else were tiny cottages with crooked roofs, their stone-flagged floors brightened by rag rugs, the ceilings hung with braids of onions and fragrant herbs, the rooms furnished with old-fashioned oak sideboards and grandfather clocks and chairs with woven rush seats."~ Susan Wittig Albert
With all the flitter fluttering of weekly news and current events, I am terribly unimpressed, and THEY ARE OF no interest. I don't believe in depression. I am an eternal optimist. Can we feel lacklustre? Yes, of course, I am human; however, I refuse to believe in anything that seizes my power away.
In the last few months, I've had to accept that I am at a life threshold. At the start, I was distressingly slow to accept my fate for pushing back our move and the cottage remains all packed up. My beloved husband will have surgery procedures soon, and these uncontrollable circumstances are something I've had to come to abide by. The past version of me would have usually been quite upset. Perhaps even present an altered resistance to having a spiritual blowup. Yet, this new woman that I am will mean listening and sharing my heart with the words of those who wander near as I no longer desire to withdraw in isolation alone but feel my soul whispering, assuring me to trust the process. There is significant meaning in every slight detail of my wondering voyage. It's perfect for me, as yours are flawless for you, my dear hearts. I hope you know you may always feel at home here, and if you ever need a hand, I am here for you. This place is your haven. Autumn stands for me, a voice of quietude.
The temperatures in Florida are quite a bit hot, and oh, how I've had so many particulars to accomplish in the garden; however, I can scarcely remain outside for longer than an hour. In a bid to assist you in an unbearable reflection of the heat, let us turn towards tea! If you're a Patron on my Patreon (The Curious Mind of Raquel Carter), you know all about Jeffrey Shawn and me and our plans for the future; it would only make sense that if we are to have a tea room, our own teapots and teacup saucer sets would be the next logical step. Our little tea sets are on their way from England. If you are interested in a collectors set, I ordered a small batch of each. The two styles I have are The Tale of the Christmas Bunnies and the other is The Carter Settlement. The inspiration for The Carter Settlement tea set is the manor house at Chinsegut Hill. The grounds are also dispersed equally in the illustrations of The Tale of Sawyer Lamb. If you are a resident of Brooksville, you'd fancy a piece of our heritage.
Each teapot accompanies two teacups and two saucers. The pictures above are merely a mockup; however, I assure you the final product is proper brilliance. I won't whinge on too much in a bid to convince you to buy a set because I know my dear mermaid hearts do not need much coaxing. They will be delightful Christmas gifts. If you're interested, place your name on preorder here in the comment section.
I plan to be a vendor at Heritage Days in downtown Brooksville in December. If you are local, I hope you'll pop by and call upon me. I'll have all sorts of handmade home and kitchen goods, including beeswax candles, books, illustrations, and tea sets.
There has been vast communication in the world of online blogging and substack about the overly happy and optimistic person, the happy gene and the nefarious manner social media (Instagram in particular) is sending women on the road to ruin when the toxic positivity gets pushed too aggressively. "That believing and focusing on the little things and being happy happy happy is not normal and is more harmful than good." I will call this into focus, my dears, as I have a few things to say about the topic, regardless of not enhancing my popularity. Happiness is a choice. Internal joy is a lifelong pursuit. Is happiness fleeting? Yes, but a deepness of joy is an inherent emotion. The objective of life is to fine-tune one's preoccupation with an emphasis on priority. Actually, for the majority, having grown up in a world where external forces are the way to get happy, or if we have money, connections, or success, it is possible to be satisfied at all times. This sentiment isn't true. Happiness is fleeting, yes, but joy stands if it is worked upon to become a character trait. Joy is a most devoted sensation and must exist as a pursuit to achieve, for this is our employment as human beings. As little children, we knew what intrinsic joy felt like; however, many of us were taught and integrated away from these deeply natural tendencies. We must get back there.
"Easily Distracted by Kittens and Garden"
I have a few new paintings to share with you. I made prints of "It's What Friends Do", and if you're interested, I have four remaining prints left in my Etsy shop. The time is fleeting, yes, of course. Yet, I have been feeling betwixt and between. Without going further into those sentiments too deeply here on ye olde blog, I'll keep those details for my Patrons. Let me state I want to be Lucy when she finds the wardrobe that transports her to a magical world, Narnia. Do you ever have those sensations?
I solemnly understand more with each passing day why my longings are to dwell waxed beneath the moon in an old Victorian stone thatched roof cottage with gaps in the doors and cracks in the window sills where little air draft slips through, shifting the lace curtains ever so gently.
I have feelings of unbelonging, and whereas my once upon a time, the natural response would be to flee, I am working through the transitional phase of finding where I belong. To settle my senses and fluttering nervousness as if I am a wild rabbit and the wolf is at my door, abdicating my safety.
The aspect of myself and remaining in touch with my heart chakra went long overdue, tormented by the dreadful notion I honestly wouldn't ever change intrinsically; however, those impulses no longer succumb to my mind. I am improving. I am kinder to myself these days, and with that kindness is being gentle as I move slowly through, rise and thoroughly heal of past displeasure and pains. If I am capable of releasing my emotions to my dearest friend in all the world, I am able to shift rather swiftly. I am very proud of myself for my allowance of vulnerability. If many women would also come to this knowing for themselves, the world and future generations would mend and cure their ailing hearts.
My art and my books have never led me astray, and that is something of which to be appreciative. There is a readiness for the end of summer, and until then, I am confident these emotions will change and change me in all of the good ways. My self-acceptance and self-love have grown wildly and beautifully these last four years.
Most affably yours til' my next swim, Razz
"Feelings of unbelonging..." Wow, can I relate. It is peculiar how that works within us. I will say, because I know you will understand, I am inspired by Ma Ingalls. Wherever they lived, home was where she was and the home she created. It must have been difficult for her at times.
ReplyDeleteBlessings for JS as he proceeds through the coming surgeries.
The sentiment of feeling of unbelonging was the best I could conjure up. I do relate and understand you completely, in reference to Ma Ingalls. I have to agree I bet she also felt life was difficult at times. A woman longs to have her very own "nittens" as my great gran used to say.
DeletePS When is Christmas Bunnies book scheduled for release?
ReplyDeleteIt will be the first week in October. I am so tickled. It's such a sweet book. Well, I think they are all sweet, but then again I am biased. Teehee...
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