Rachel Hollis: Girl, Tell the Truth! {Actually, You Did See This Coming}

The other day I came upon my dearly Beloved Gardener watching Good Morning America. Besides Downton Abbey continuously on an endless loop, I'm not much of a tele watcher; however, I did happen to see Rachel Hollis's segment promoting her book "Didn't See That Coming." 

Are You Constantly Dependent And Sucker Fish Stuck With Detached Mates {I'll Shed Some Scales On Why This Happens}

My dear friends, and Mermaid Junkies, 

I am so happy you're here. I have the most fun thinking about all of the loveliest topics to cover on this here ol' blog.

I have to tell you, there is nothing more exciting than thinking about what to write, and how to try and inspire you, my darling pod. That would be you dear ones! Have I told you that my first love is writing? I'm sure that I have, I tend to state that on repeat to anyone with a listening ear. {smile} I am so appreciative for my most beautiful dreams coming true. But that's not why I'm writing to you today.

My Beatrix Potter'ings At Carter's Cottage, Book Release, And Splendid Intentions

My dear friends,

Let us have some tea. I am going to make some scones from a receipt that I found. However, I intend on changing it up a bit. A few of the ingredients that I will properly use will be rose water, rose petals and the nut selected will be pistachio. I am naming the scone Merrymaid Scarlette Rose Tea Scones. If however, they are a splendid tasting scone I will add them to the menu when I get my very own tea room {MerryMaid Scarlette Rose's Bakery and Tea Cottage}.

Your Anchoring Beliefs Are Preventing You From Being A Powerful Manifestor {And How To Remove Them Swiftly}

My dear friends,

Pour some tea, and let's chat about our childhood belief systems, shall we? Oh, how delightful a topic! 

"The way I feel is always an indicator of where my vibration is at."

It feels quite brilliant to be back to writing. Another subject that I wanted to share with you is the spirituality aspect of vibrations and emotional scales. 

I Am The Next Beatrix Potter {According To Abraham Hicks}

Good day, Dear friends, 

I had the jolliest of a good time during holiday. I have now returned with an ingenious, most important, way to account for even more expansion with my online diary/blog. I also spent the better portion of 2020, carving out a more accurate depiction of what I desire for my spiritual voyage. My desire has continually been that I want you to come, settle in with me, have a cup of tea and chat.  However, I also have the desire to bring thought to a new Sphere. There are many delightful websites that cover the topic of spirituality. However, I myself was beginning to grow bored. Have you? Now, don't mistake me, and I'm admittedly in tune with everyone having their own journey, it just seems that once folks get to a specific place with the law of attraction, if they don't manifest large desires, they become disillusioned. They begin to believe that the LOA doesn't work. Also, as I was contemplating this for myself and receiving feedback from others, it tuned me into the frequency of wanting to expand in my knowledge even further to uncover why this was transpiring. If not for myself, but to also share with you. As I was in meditation a few days in a row, I came upon a video that set me right. I realised what was happening and why some folks would complain of manifestation barriers. I know I have discovered the answer. I want to share a few categories that many who know or semi~practice the Law of Attraction tend to fall into. 

Why Blocking Me On Social Media Is The Creepiest Form Of Flattery

My dear friend, 

Why you ask, am I in the least bit concerned about this topic or even for that matter writing about it? Well, to begin with, I have this blog for reasons of wanting to dissect issues of human behaviour, to deeply understand why people do what they do. Furthermore, I think if it's something that at one time has bothered the stew out of me, then I would be willing to make a million-dollar bet, some other person has had the issue as well. I'm going to tell you why folks do this and how to find the ease within yourself if it ever happens in your realm of experience. 

A Happy Victorian Christmas

My dear friends, 

Might you pour some tea and let us have a visit. I am having some peachy Teavana with half of a chocolate muffin. It's been quite muggy, rainy and cold out, and I welcome it to the most considerable degree, as It makes me feel as though I'm down the lane from Beatrix Potter's home; Hill Top.

Why I Had An Emotional Affair {And What All Affairs Mean, According To Me}

My dear friends,

Well, I'm going to assume that you clicked onto my post, strictly because of the title, am I right? I'm delighted! I mean to lead you into further inquiry. {smile}

As a writer/ blogger putting my life and personal experiences into the universe are something I take satisfaction in; if you want the truth. Because in my lil' humble opinion, all too often, I see folks continuously restrain. Now- that's not to say that, every blogger out there needs to spill their insides, however, let us be a little more forthright and transparent, shall we?

In my life, many have judged me for sharing much here on my blog {my family included}, even to go so far as to tell me, I should feel embarrassed for what I write. They think it's a betrayal and that I'm shedding a negative light on my family. I have no quorums about sharing my truth. That's what the writer does. Perhaps that portion is from my English heritage. One musn't ever divulge family affairs, however, I believe one might derive some benefit from it, and I wouldn't want to leave out any missing elements to my story.

Furthermore, I have the most positive feedback from women that tell me, they are so happy that I am sharing things that would otherwise be left unsaid. I wanted to preface, too, that I share for my healing, and expansion, as well as, give encouragement to other women that may have struggled, like me. It's never for salacious or cruel intentions; only for expansion and personal growth.

Now, let me have a go, shall I?

The emotional affair occurred in 2009. There were no sexual relations {cue the Bill Clinton tapes}, but it's an affair when you know intuitively you are sharing and becoming too close with another person at the expense of emotions and secrecy. Quite frankly, the incident was a guarantee, now that I've had years to reflect on it. I also think it's much more dangerous to have an emotional relationship than a strictly sexual one. Why? Because a woman becomes very attached to another with regards to her emotions.

I had been married at this point for 18 years. I was strict, by the Bible/Book of Mormon, type of woman. In fact, I had myself many times admonished my ex to be cautious of his actions with other women. I used to tell him, even the appearance of adultery is substandard. Let's be clear, here, I know that no matter what we as women do or say in a marriage, won't mean a thing if there is no respect. That means for ourselves, our partner or the union of marriage. If a man or woman is going to be a charlatan, they will find a way to do so. No amount of control will stop either of them.

My ex was in entertainment, so, needless to say, I was insecure from the get-go and then in addition to entertainment atop that, only spelt disaster. Not because of entertainment per se, but the lacking of self-worth on my part. My ex-husband has always been a flirtatious lad, {and later I would uncover that he was a philandering adulterer}. Ladies, if you start dating a man, and you have any sneaking suspicion that he may be the unfaithful kind, you should run for the hills. It'll only worsen as time proceeds.  But, then, hindsight is 20/20, isn't it? I ignored my instinct when my ex and I first got together. Red flags were waving all about, but I was blissed out and ignored them. I believe intuitively I knew we were ill-suited from the start. He was constant in his actions of hurting and disappointing me. Nowadays, though, I don't beat myself about the head; in fact, I actually thank the nasty bugger for his philandering ways. He facilitated my becoming strong and forthright. 

Read this post {here} That I wrote about mating with your own soul and emotional mirror reflection.

Mmmmkay, back to the subject at hand. What led up to my emotional affair? Years of emotional neglect, pure friendship, deceit, and built-up resentment, layered like bricks for decades. 

He was my ex-husband's friend for over a decade. They were in church movies together; mingling in the same crowd. He spent a lot of time with our family; and single. I adored him. He made me feel like I was a lovely person, and he also made me see things that truthfully I didn't want to see for a very long time. He was also very persuasive, and I was very naive.

Well, as luck would have it, my ex took a trip for work, in the middle of us moving into our newly purchased home, and suggested having his friend come to help me with house "stuff."


We had been friends for over a decade, and I appreciated the time he'd spend with me. He'd actually carry on a conversation with me; compliment me, by saying, I looked beautiful in my old skirts and liked all the things my husband was annoyed by. You might think it a disaster, however, It was the very thing I needed to feel alive again. I would have never started, were it not for the unhappiness, to begin with. That is the truth about affairs. Whether it's an actual sexual affair or an emotional one; if you are miserable, the only thing that you want to do in life is to find a way of feeling good. This person made me feel beautiful. I had breath in my lungs again.

That emotional affair was a blessing in disguise because it caused me to begin looking head-on at all of my issues in my own life and in my marriage. My marriage was never the same after that. I attempted to file for divorce, even moving out for six months. I then ended up moving to California, and, well, you know what happened after that. It all worked out in the end, as it solidified how much I desired to leave the marriage. This was a paramount decision; because things are always working out for us, even when it seems they aren't.

Looking back, after living through the experiences with my ex, he was continually circumventing. I have often wondered, too, if I allowed that to happen? You know that saying, " people treat you, the way you allow them too?" Yeah, that. I really do think so! I will say, too, and it may be difficult for some to read; however, I have come to the conclusion that it had to do with the "saviour" mentality. Do you know what this is? Let me explain. My mother exhibits this behaviour, I struggled with it, and many women struggle with it, that have grown up in abusive or alcoholic environments. Women cover for the addict, by continually making up the difference. It's a self-worth issue on the part of the "abusee". For example, {I'm speaking from experience when I was young}, my father would come home from work, get plastered, and then decide he was hungry. My mother was to wake up {regardless of the time} and make him food. I remember he was so angry after the meal was made, he threw the whole pot of food onto the floor. Who do you think cleaned that up, after my father passed out in his own piss? My mother did. But, who do you think comes off as the person to save the day? My mother. She can use the victim card to receive sympathy from others. Thus, all active participants are getting their natural human needs met, even though it's complete dysfunction, it works. I had to retrain myself out of this behaviour, and let me tell you; that when a person has control issues {kids of alcoholic parents}, it's not easy. I had to allow the mishaps to occur and let nature takes its course.

{I would also like to clarify that my momma reads my blog and she understands that to help other women such as ourselves we must share our stories. I adore my mother, and she has, too, like me, learned to have inner self-confidence, love and worth.}

So, for instance, once, when my ex was in a fit of rage, screamed at me because Subway put mayonnaise on his sub sandwich, he threw it against the wall, where it stuck. My little girl began trying to clean the mess, and that's when I lost my mind. That day, the straw broke the camels back. I was seeing the behaviour passed onto my child; through watching me. I began screaming, "over my dead body will anyone but my ex, clean that sub up!" I didn't care if the sub stayed on the wall for 6 months and we had guests coming over. I was ready to let him look like a fool.

Needless, to say, he cleaned the mess, as it was gone the next morning. Now- I know what you may be thinking here, Ummm... grrr...CRAZY TOWN! Yes, I know. I don't want you to feel alone if this is, or has, happened to you. The problem is that many want to escape through pretty, frilly things; but, when we get to the brass tacks, we can then begin to heal and move forward. I speak of this because I was this way myself. It doesn't have to be a negative thing to carry for the rest of our lives, and that's why I am sharing it, I feel as though, many women, if they knew why they did things {cover for their mate, or child, for instance}, they might be inspired to change. I genuinely believe that the universe allows experiences to come to us, not as a way of punishment, but as a way to encourage us to expansion. How else would I have learned? We learn through life experience, that's the only way. I am so appreciative for my lessons, always. It's just a matter of shifting our focus to see all the occurrences with beauty and look at them with a heart of appreciation, instead of, being oppressed by a "God" that most humans deem vengeful. That is not who my or your God/Source is. AT ALL!

" I dwell in possibility." ~Emily Dickinson

Yep, I carried that rescue mentality with me into my marriage with my ex. He would act slow-witted, and because I was embarrassed and had low-self esteem, I would make excuses for him. It's an exciting scenario, when we allow others, even those we love very much, to take responsibility for their own lives. Amazing things happen. I believe that we, as women, must genuinely work to become self-sufficient and self-confident. That is our sole purpose; to fall, completely and madly in love with ourselves.

And when this self-love transformation occurs within us, women like myself won't need to have some man tell us we're lovely, and pretty, because we'll already KNOW!


Most affably yours til my next swim, Raquelxxx

To New Beginnings

My dear friends,

I shall try and give you little bits and pieces of myself here on my brand NEW blog. I'm entirely beyond enthusiastic to begin a new and share my life with you; my friends.